A new life...

Again its time to leave home. Time to move from my familiar surroundings to a new one. Adjustments. Each morning when I'll wake up, I wont see the black clock on the wall facing me. Or the study table overflowing with books. I wont have Mom shouting at me for sleeping so late. In fact, I wont be able to sleep late!! (Oh god, how will I survive?!! )

Its not college. I dont have to rush for my classes. No need to be afraid of the teachers. Now its time to be screwed by my Boss!! No bunking classes, no texting friends during lectures. Oh god, I'm going to office!! Like Dad. I always wanted to go to office like him when I was a kid. It felt so nice then. The idea then was, Office is for grown-ups. And today, I am a grown-up.

Ahhh... just a week left. My first job. Hope it does me good. I have dreams. Big ones. I need to turn them into reality.

I am...

I am the epitome of power.

I am the mixture of the artist's colour on a white canvas.

I am the poet's blank verse.

I am the sculptor's chisel-work.

I am sunshine. I am the monsoon shower.

I am the cool breeze. I am the starry sky.

I fight. I love.

I cry when I'm happy. I pretend to be happy when I'm not.

I am strong. I am delicate.

I am calm. I am fiery.

I am a daughter. I am a wife. I am a mother.

I die million times but I revive each time.

Because....

I AM A WOMAN.

The Wait

I wait for the day

When the mornings will turn from red to orange to pink.
When the nights wont be black anymore.
When the moon will shine from grey to a sparkling silver....
When the rainbow will be an amalgamation of purple, jade and emarald hues....

I wait for the day when you'll pull me close to you and say,

"Crazy girl, you were always mine....!!!"

Silence

Do we always need to speak to communicate?

Isn't Silence a better way of communication?

Communicating through words often end up in misunderstandings.

But that will never be the case if you are Silent.

Silence is indeed magical. Try it.

Its Musical. Thats what you call "MUSIC OF SILENCE".

Untitled....

Why is it that at times I feel so depressed, down and disappointed? Its the gloomy weather, I guess. Or is it? There are times when the sun is shining with all its might, yet I'm feeling blue. Is it the hot weather? I guess not.

Then what is it that at times make me feel so small, so unwanted? At those times I feel I have not done justice with the people around me. I could never become the daughter my parents wanted or the elder sister that I should have been to my sibling. I failed to love the person I love. Have I done any good to my friends? I dont think so too...

I feel like venting out my bottled up feelings. They make me feel so nasty and crappy.

I wanna shout out and cry... But I am strong.. Or am I?

turn to the last page...

Do you have any notebook with the last page untouched... not even a single pen mark? I'm not talking about a brand new notebook.. Its the notebook we carry to class to take down "notes". Or the so-called notes! If you have, you are categorized as the "studious" or "nerd. :)

The last page is generally the witness of a boring lecture or a broken heart. It serves as an artist's palate, a blogger's rough sheet, a poet's scribbling pad or a cartoonist's canvas. Starting from chit-chat between two neighbours in a class room, to fashionable designs of outfits... bitching about boyfriends (in case of girls)... commenting on the hotness of girls (in case of guys).... all can be found in that one last page. Testing of pens to check if it contains ink, is also done in this page.

Last page of the notebook is actually what makes the notebook interesting! Whenever I borrow a notebook from my friend, I make sure I turn to the last page. Hoping to find out who her secret crush is!! And when I lend mine to someone, I make sure I scratch out all my secret talks or scribbles and mutilate them in a fashion which is absolutely impossible to decipher!

I leave you with the last page of my Sister's notebook...

You know you are from SMIT when....

10.  Your friends, relatives or acquaintances have atleast once thought you were doing a distance education course from Sikkim Manipal.

9. You've cursed the placed "n" number of times (with "n" tending to infinity) yet felt bad the day you walked out of this place.

8. You hate Vishnu and Gurukripa for robbing you innumerable times in these four years.

7. By closing your eyes you can distinguish between the parathas of Bawa, Aunty, Om, Jaggu.

6. You have tasted the girls' hostel famous Birthday cake atleast once.

5. Baker's Cafe and Roll House will be etched in your mind forever.

4. You know the significance of the nomenclatures of PMC and Mall Road...!!

3. You have got at least one Zero in any quiz or sessionals in the 4 years (if not, you are not a true Smitian!!!)

2. You have mass-bunked at least once in the 4 years (if you have not, you are not a true Smitian either!!!)

1. You are familiar with the names Counterstrike, DotA, Tiberium Wars, Call of Duty, Splintercell... guys for obvious reasons and girls,courtesy gamer boyfriends!!!

P.S.... there are lot more.. feel free to add... :)

Inky PINKY....!!

Recently I encountered a tragedy of sitting through a 3-hour long bogus movie, which at the end made me feel like pulling out all my hairs...aghhh!!! Anyway, the topic of my post is not the movie, but a fact which the movie stressed upon vividly... The fact that Girls go ga-ga over the colour PINK....!!

I started to wonder why on earth is the colour Pink related to girls. Its a common notion among the boys that Pink is a "girly colour"... so any boy in a pink shirt is highly ridiculed by his friends!!!  I Googled my query, and yes indeed this have been an extensive matter of study for scientist!! (Maybe they too were wondering like me!!) But if the results of the studies are carefully read, never has it proved that the fairer sex adores the colour Pink, but that they are biologically programmed to prefer the Redder shades of Blue.

Surprisingly, my wardrobe contains no Pink dress... not even a single one! I have no affinity for that particular colour. Neither do I have a Pink room with Pink bedspread, or Pink pillows and Pink curtains. My favourite colour is Black, followed by Blue.  When I go out shopping, I generally pick up dresses in shades of Black or Blue... each time annoying  Mum. Pink never appealed me ever. At a time when I had no sense of my own (the time a was a baby!) maybe my parents dressed me up in the conventional Pink, but never after I reached an age of voicing my opinion about my dresses!

An appeal to all the males out there... Pink is not all girls' favourite colour, we dont go Ga-ga when ever we see a pink thread.. we dont necessarily hug a Pink teddy when we are happy or when we are sad. We dont see Pink everywhere when we are in love..... Its only on the silver screen that Pink is so popular!!

Merci Beaucoup

After pondering over it for quite a while, I finally decide that in my first blog entry I would like to thank certain people,who are all special in their own small way.

The person who gave me the idea of starting a blog to kill my time indeed needs to be thanked absolutely at the beginning. He's my cousin. The first cousin who made me realize the importance and existence of bhaiphonta... that cousin whom I've seen grow from a baby in diapers to a young gentleman now... that cousin who is a techie guy... the cousin who was named Boudhayan by his Mum and Dad... but the cousin whom I call Bua.

A sister is a little bit of childhood that can never be lost.  ~Marion C. Garretty
Yes, you got that correct... its time to thank one of the important person in my life. My little Sis, Toma. I think of the day years ago when she saw the light of this world... I was a kid of exactly 5 years and 7 months and 23 days.....!! She brought along with her a new kind of excitement in my young and tender life. It was an experience which was never experienced before.... I remember the first time I saw her... like a cherub,she was asleep in her cot, holding on to the rod as if she was afraid of falling off...!!!
And today this little baby girl has turned into a beautiful young lady of 17...!! All my admiration for this strong-headed girl, in spite of all the rough times we have had throughout our childhood...(and still have)!!! the fights, the tears, the smiles, the pranks.... everything holds a special place in my heart....a special note of gratitude to the "sister of my heart".

Ahana.... the friend I have been having since the days of Sahaj Paath and Barnaporichoy. We've been in and out of touch quite a number of times (usually when we got seperated by the virtue of being in different sections!!) yet, our friendship emerged as a successful one. Analysing our friendship at the present times, I can confidently say that I have been blessed with a sister whom God forgot to give me! This crazy yet sweet little girl has been there with me through my ups and downs. I've shared my deepest secrets with her, I have found solace in her words when I was down and needed a loving hand to hold.  My best friend...for now and always... Thank You.

The person who is a crackpot, crazy, loud, talkative yet gentle, practical and the best when it comes to heal your wounds, is none other than Debduti. We have been friends for the past 9-10 years and its has been a relation of fights, sulks, i-wont-talk-to-you-ever days, hugs, tears.... There is no topic under the sun which I cant share with this girl. Thanks DB and cheers to our friendship!

Many are blessed with such a friend whose mere existence adds a splash of extra color in one's life. Sayantan is that friend to me. At a time when I was venturing into a completely new world, stepping out through the gates of school, walking into the unprotected world, I befriended him. And he has been my confidante, my guide, my support ever since. I have found him whenever I needed a friend, he has seen me at my best and tackled me at my worst...!! One thing I know for sure, that in life's pathway, destiny might design separate paths for us, but I will find him by my side whenever I need him. THANK YOU Sayantan, for loving me as your friend and tolerating me whenever I behave as a rude,arrogant monster!! :D

At the end of the post, I thank the two most important people for whom my existence is a reality. Thanks Ma, thanks Baba.

Some people whose presence has made a significant difference to my life....

Thanks Ujjwal for being the best brother.
Thanks Arya for making me realize how to "fall in crush"....!!!
Thanks Jeet for cheering me up each time I'm blue.